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6.14.2014

Feeling Like a Failure

some days I mess things up big time. Some days I make a fool of myself. Some days I wish I had never woke up. Some days I wonder how God still loves me with all my mistakes.

Just when I feel like I'm beginning to feel accepted, I go and make a mess of things and feel like such a failure. I screw things up and I feel so dumb. I wish I could restart the day and do it all over again. 

In this life we do things that aren't perfect. We make mistakes. We fail. We do things we wish we never would have done. We wish we could take things back and could start over again. Well, to God we can always start over. God always will give us a second chance. Even though we fail a thousand times, He will still be there for us to go to again and will forgive us when we ask from our heart.

People often hold grudges after we ask for forgiveness and bring back up our past mistakes. Sometimes they never act the same again. Sometimes after you share your inner self, they treat you differently. God never holds a grudge after we ask forgiveness. He never brings up our past mistakes. He never treats us differently when looking within our heart, because that's where He has been looking all along.

Sometimes the worst part of forgiveness is forgiving myself and moving on. When I mess things up I often feel disappointed and upset at myself. I feel disgrace and disappointed, maybe because I know God is disappointed in me too. But when we ask for forgiveness we are admitting our wrongs and that we messed up. One thing I have to remember when I go to God seeking forgiveness is to remember to refrain from the sin in the future. Part of forgiveness is remembering the sin and not to do it again, because over time we forget the guilt we felt and we end up doing it again.

So if you are feeling upset from a sin in your life or something you fowled up, know that you can go to God and it will all be made new again once you ask forgiveness sincerely- it's not just saying you want to be forgiven, but actually meaning it. Forgiveness involves refraining from the sin in the future and leaning on God for guidance and strength. We all are sinful and make mistakes- that is why we need God's continual help and guidance.

Psalm 103:12
as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Isaiah 43:25
"I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.

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