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2.08.2013

Thoughts on my Mind

Will I ever be accepted? 

Will anyone ever love me just for who I am?

No matter where I go people just seem to avoid me and don't let me join in their "group"

I feel so inadequate and inferior towards others

I sometimes wonder if I will ever have a special friend who wants to be just with me and have fun-almost every friend in the past has left me in the dust and neglected me.

I wonder if I will ever have that special guy tell me he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful

I constantly wish I wasn't so afraid of what others thought- it truly hinders me from expressing myself and speaking my thoughts

I wish I spoke out more and could talk more freely- but it is something so strong that I feel like I can't push myself to do it.

Bread Loaf Tessellations, Tasmania #landscape #photography
It feels like every girl out there has a best friend to go out and spend time with and loves her except me

I get so self conscious about how I look and I feel awkward in social settings sometimes

No matter where I go I don't seem to fit in, feel accepted, special or popular

I don't think I will ever have the confidence in myself that others have

I don't think I'll ever have the courage to do the hard things that are awaiting me in the future

why can't life be easy- why are things so hard?


How come just when you are beginning to feel comfortable and happy with where you are in your life, one night can change everything and make you feel so sad, terrible and disappointed in yourself?
Sometimes I just get so depressed over the things in my past and I wonder how I ever got through it all. But being able to look past all that, all those hard and depressing times and taking the good out of those situations helps me find a better focus on my life.


It is easy to just look at all the negatives of life- the constant struggles and facing so much rejection and peer pressure of life, but in reality it won't matter how popular you are or how much you fit in. It is such a great feeling to know that when I don't feel like I fit in anywhere down here, it doesn't matter. I'm not supposed to fit in down here in this world. It is just temporary. Tonight I went to Bible Study and nobody seemed that friendly and I normally feel this way when I go. After trying to be kind to people and wanting to talk to others, but they just ignore me and don't even make eye contact with a lowly person as me. It just leaves me feeling so discrasted with myself because nobody that I come in contact with ever seems to care enough to connect on a deeper level than just the "how are you?"
As I was driving home tonight and I felt upset inside- and just looking at the stars and the amazingness of God it allowed me to know that when I don't feel accepted down here and don't have a close friend with someone in my daily interactions, I do have an eternal Friend. And tonight I was reminded that the GOD of the universe loves me and He accepts me when nobody else does. He sees my heart more than anyone else and still chooses to be my best Friend and He takes the time to listen to my every need. I'm awful glad that God is my best friend and not someone else. Others will fail me (and I will fail them too) but God will never fail us in any way.

There are others out there who do not know the great joy of having Jesus as their friend. It is so reassuring when I feel so despised with myself that He still loves me, thinks I am beautiful and sees my inner heart and motives. He sees how hard I'm trying to be nice, He sees how others treat me and He sees that I'm different from others.

So, don't let others get you down. Don't let them make you feel like you are inferior to them. Everyone was created the same in God's eyes. He loves us all and doesn't treat one better than another. We should put others first and not ourselves.
Well, that's all for now- I'm sorry for the kind of depressing post, but I just felt kind of upset tonight. Hopefully you were encouraged by something I wrote! Thanks for dropping by!

Please feel to drop a comment if you have been experiencing anything I mentioned in the post in your life as well: )

19 comments:

  1. This post is right on track of what I'm feeling. You are not alone in the feelings. I wonder at who my real friends really are and really don't have any except for my wonderful blogging friends. Don't worry there will be a special guy that will love you for who you truly are and will sweep you off your feet. :)

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    1. Thanks Hadassah for your comment. I'm so glad that I'm not alone when I feel this way. You sound like exactly like me!! Thanks so much for your comment- it is so encouraging and made my day! :)

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  2. Oh Britt, I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling. Seasons of life will come and go, but we mustn't forget that this earth is not our home.

    "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." -Proverbs 18:24

    I consider the Lord to be my greatest friend, so whenever I struggle with loneliness I cast my burdens unto Him in prayer, and then do the work He calls me to do, which (for me) is serving my family as best I can. :)

    Praying!

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    1. Wow, your comment is so inspiring. I love the first sentences you wrote!! So true, God is our greatest friend!! Thanks for this reminder Nela! :)

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  3. My latest blog post was about struggling with what others think of me and feeling inadequate to share with other girls how I am dealing with sin in my life.

    It can drive me mad sometimes. I get angry at myself when I can't reach perfection. I push myself to be someone different because of what people think of me. No one is perfect though. I workout, wear makeup, learn a different language, don't eat anything. The list goes on.

    All our Heavenly Father sees though is beauty. He has been teaching me my whole life that He is more than capable of fulfilling all my needs. One of my favorite songs is you are my all in all and I sing it all the time to remind myself that He is all I need. I don't need to be perfectly skinny and wear makeup and be charming and witty to get a man to love me. I just need to trust the Lord and be in love with Him.

    Thank you so much for being so honest in your blog posts. It inspired me to be more honest and encouraging to my readers.

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    1. Thanks so much for your comment Ariel. Yeah, so true- I get angry at myself when I don't fit in, I mess up or I don't express who I am inside. I love that song as well, such great words in it!! Aww...thanks! :) That means so much to me- that's so cool!!! Thanks for your comment!!

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  4. Britt, I'll always be there for you. Though we night never meet each other, I will always be your friend for who you are. Sometimes, I feel the same way you do. But, then I tell myself that God always listens, always is there even when it feels like He's distant, and all He sees in us Christians is purity and beauty because we're washed in the blood. I love you, Britt. I will never desert you. And remember Joshua 1:9, Jeremiah 29:11, and Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. God will always love you; so will I.
    Heidi Anne<3

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    1. Thanks so much Heidi for your comment! :) Thanks for being there for me and for caring and understanding!! Thanks so much for the reassurance and encouraging words!!!!! You are so sweet! :)

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  5. Oh, Britt! I feel this way sometimes too. I hear you when you said, "I wish I had the confidence in myself that others have." I'll be praying for you!

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    1. Aww...thanks, glad that you could relate to something I mentioned. Sorry that you don't feel confidence in yourself either. It sure does lower your view of yourself. I will be praying that God gives you confidence! :) Thanks for your comment and your prayers!! :)

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  6. I feel the exact same way Britt... lately I've felt like I can't do anything right, and like I don't belong anywhere. But I went to youth group for the first time the other night... and it was amazing. I really could relate to what the pastor was saying. I'm definitely going back.

    Thanks again for this post. <3

    Love,
    Hannah

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    1. Hannah, thanks for your comment! :) Sorry that you feel like you don't belong..but, That's so cool that you went to youth group and you felt loved there. That is fantastic! I'm so glad that you can go there and feel loved. Hopefully you will continue to grow with the other people there : )Thanks for your comment!

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    2. That's great Hannah! :) I'm glad you enjoyed it! :)

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  7. Britt, my heart breaks for you. I wish I lived near you and that I could be that friend to you. Please, if you ever want someone to talk to you can always email me, anytime

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    1. Hey Lissie- thanks so much for your comment. Thanks for letting me know you are there for me, such a great encouragement!! :) Thanks for always being such a great and caring friend!

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  8. Thank you for posting this! I feel like this alot but this really helped lift my spirits! =)



    P.S. I'm hosting my 100 followers giveaway! I would love for you to enter!
    http://www.alifeworthliving-katherine.blogspot.com/2013/02/my-100-followers-giveaway.html

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    1. Oh, thanks so much!!! :) Glad you enjoyed the post!

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  9. I totally understand these feelings. Thanks so much for posting. Nice music picks on the right sidebar as well. I personally really like Worn, and it fits this blog post in my opinion.

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    1. Thanks for your comment : ) oh, thanks!! those are actually my Youtube videos on my channel! :) I'm glad you liked the songs. Yeah, worn would be a good one for this post!! Thanks for dropping by!

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