Feeling Flawed

Do you ever feel like everyone expects you to be perfect? Like they have a vision of who they want you to be and you feel like you constantly have to meet up to their expectations and be that perfect person? Sometimes I feel like I can't handle it anymore. I can't fulfill all the expectations everyone has of me. I can't be perfect because I'm flawed, broken and imperfect. I make mistakes, I fail, I can't please everyone. Sometimes I feel like everyone has such high expectations of who I'm supposed to be, and I grow weary in feeling like people are trying to change me to be something I'm not.

Sometimes it's hard looking back over my life and seeing how my struggles have influenced who I am today. It's hard seeing how the hardships I've had have changed me. Sometimes I become upset because of how they have influenced my life and it makes me feel different from others because of how they affected me. Losing my dad when I was 6 really impacted my life, although I think I was too young to fully realize it at the time. Not having him as my protector and provider really made me feel insecure and vulnerable. I became more fearful of things and didn't feel as adventurous, confident or outgoing. These are definitely things I still struggle with to this day. It's been difficult letting go of my insecurities in myself and opening up when, for so long, I've felt unprotected and hurt.

Maybe you have had experiences in your life where you feel like they have changed you. Your circumstances have impacted your life and it's hard to overcome the changes they caused. Often times it is easier to focus on the negatives through our trials rather than how we have grown and strengthened. I know from my experience of enduring trials in my own life it has often made me feel more flawed and broken at the time, rather than strengthened. It is hard to overcome the mindset of how we feel broken and focus on how we are strengthened and have grown through that time. Each struggle might make us feel hurt and may be painful, but God always has a purpose to everything we endure. We may feel like it is hurting and harming us, but God in His mysterious ways is using it for good. We may not see it now, but in time we will. It is neat how we each experience and react differently to our experiences and God is using the circumstances touching your life right now, or that you have experienced, to impact others in a unique way that nobody else could.

Maybe you feel stretched and pulled in every direction right now. Maybe you feel like everyone is expecting so much from you and it's hard to focus and listen to all of the voices and keep it all together. Take a moment and seek God. Go to Him and let His voice drown out all that the world is telling you. His voice is all that matters. Focus on Him and you will go in the right direction and focus on what is truly necessary.You don't have to worry about feeling accepted by Him. He loves you and is always there for you no matter what. He always has your best in mind.

Genesis 50:20

You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.

Proverbs 16:3
Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.